3 years, how much longer?

by Becca
(Rigby, ID)

Hi im Becca im 28 years old. my husband and i have a 16 year age difference. i remember when we got married boy was my family worried, seeing as my hubby is only 3 years younger than my dad! lol.

Any who, Shawn has been driving long haul for 3 years now, almost 4 years. he is literally gone for 8 weeks, home for 2-3 nights. usually just for his restart.

we have 2 young daughters, Mackenzie 7 years old and Kayla Sue 5 years old. its hard on them, they miss their daddy.

when he first left to drive, i remember crying so hard that i had to pull over off the free way. after 6 or so months of crying and being lonely, i turned to our daughters and my animals.
Shawn missed 3 thanksgivings and 2 Christmases, he was able to spend last Christmas here!

it was wonderful! he so far has missed all his birthdays, most of his daughters and all of mine.
holidays are rough.

the whole point is, now he has gotten more distant. i know he is tired when he comes home, but is it selfish of me to want attention from him?

i mean i know that he wants to spend time with us as a family, but i make point to find someone to watch the girls every so often when he his home and he seems to get upset with me.

our relationship used to be perfect. we never really argued, we got along awesome and worked together. now we are always arguing, and he never wants to do anything with me.

don't get me wrong i know trucking is hard, and i wish we could afford for him to be home a little more often and a little longer.. but until his company starts paying more than 34 cents a mile, we just cant.

any ideas on what to do? talking to him just doesn't seem to phase him. i'm hoping that through this website i can find some advise and some support.

and just so you all know, no, i'm not thinking of leaving . i love him too much

thanks
Becca