How the world do women deal with a trucker bf?

by Marie c
(Pa)

Have you ever had a serious relationship? Do women really live their lives alone only to do your laundry, cook for you and give you sex only to say bye again???

My bf is a truck driver! How do I handle this life?? I love him and I want him to live life with me.

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Sep 13, 2013
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being in love with a trucker
by: Kim

If you truly love him then except who he is , which includes the job he does. Life with a trucker isn't easy,but life with a trucker is not limit as you stated.

When he is home yes unfortunately there is the daily crap that needs done , laundry ,a home cooked meal ,which if u have every been on the road & ate at truck stops on a daily bases, u would know how much he appreciates coming home to a great meal cooked with love. And hello , u question having quality time in the bedroom.Really ?

Its not the only way to say & show that he loves u.but it does say he loves you and loves spending time with you .& if u ain't giving it to him , he's gonna find it some where .That is part of being attracted to each other.

You should find a spark when he calls , & when he rolls in after being gone you should feel your heart skip a beat.

Yes as their other half ..wife / girlfriend ..we take on so much more.make sure the bills are paid,the grass gets cut,kids are fed & loved,the house repairs are done .but their life on the road IS NOT A BED OF ROSES ! making sure I have everything taken care of so when he's home ,we can actually spend a few moments together , talk , have him hold me & make the world go away even if its just for a moment is everything.& get this I work a 50 -60 hrs s week we've been together 25 years .

I miss him the instant he leaves ,with a tear in my eye, wishing he could stay just a little longer ,but I wouldn't have it any other way ,driving is a part of who he is & I love every part of him .

If you truly love him.take all of him . If you try to change who he is then you need to ask yourself do you really love all of him.good luck

Jun 21, 2013
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I think you absolutely right Hervy! :)
by: Anonymous

I spent time constantly worrying about what I could do for my trucker husband all the time and completely forgot about me. Once I realized what I was doing I had to do some work on myself and some planning for myself. Finally understanding that I was catering to my husbands every need and that I could potentially be creating a spoiled monster, I decided that I needed to take charge of my life.

I am a very active woman with adult children who are self sufficient and rarely need help with my grand children maybe once a year! :) I came to the conclusion I wanted to keep busy so I began working in the public service field I never have a dull moment!

Hervy is right, a true and real man wants to know he has a strong woman who has something more going for her than sitting around doing just for them....and the proof of that statement is in the pudding when my husband calls me throughout the day and listens to my daily events and says "I am so glad you have things to do to fill in the time for yourself" He is amazed with all that I do and all the skills I have in helping others to help themselves and for that reason alone I am rewarded by his comments and with many thanks from the people I help. :)

Jun 21, 2013
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Dealing with a trucker boyfriend
by: Hervy

Marie,

I am not a wife or woman but I have some thoughts about the question you posed.

About...."Do women really live their lives alone.....only to do laundry, cook, sex..."

I think this is the first thing women should consider. It's wonderful to do these things for us, most mature adult males would love a woman to also have something else important and positive going on in their lives with which to focus, time, attention and energy.

This will end up meaning several things....

1. Higher self esteem
2. Better mental stability
3. Less boredom and
4. More to talk about besides problems at home or hating his job
5. Financial security (assuming that focus is training, or school)

(Not that you are lacking in any area mentioned, I like to answer in a way that it could apply to many people reading...take the part that applies to you...)

When you say you want him to live life with you, you should define for yourself what that means. Based on that meaning, you should ask him what HIS plans for your relationship is in his mind. Which should evolve to the both of you making plans together. (the only way to be on the same page)

Many women I feel get into relationships wanting one thing and afraid to find out if the guy is wanting and planning on the same outcome for the relationship. Then they end up disappointed and shock when things go down a different path.

The only way to find out is to ask, unless the guy is highly communicative or the type to share those kinds of feelings. (Which many of us are not either.

Worried about making him mad? Ok, so why would you hope to be in a serious relationship with someone who would get mad at you asking a responsible and important question? What type of relationship will that be for you?

So protect yourself by asking questions, having boundaries and have a life of your own which contributes to your own well being in some way.

Love yourself as much as you love him.
Just as he should love himself as much as he loves you. Without proper balance you have high potential of neediness, dependence, disappointment, stress, low self esteem, depression who knows what other psychological problems.

Obviously any of these issues then turns around and eats away at the relationship and it's a downward spiral.

Hope it gives you another way of looking at it,
Hervy

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