I'm new to all this

by Erin
(Usa)

Why in the world is this literally the only chat support for us.

I am very new to this whole truck wife community. In fact I'm not married to him I'm engaged. We are going on year six of being together, 4 years of engagement. We have two beautiful boys.

I don not and have never thought he is not committed to this family, or is wanting to leave. He has just started at the trucking job back in September of 2018.

It was a rough start with him being gone the first month, I knew I would have to change my way of life for the sake of our family. On top of him being gone. otr. Is what he does.

I feel as if I'm a single mother who is alone and having to explain to my oldest (who is 4) , that his dad loves us and why he's not home, And to my youngest (who is 2), that not every man you see is your father.

I know this is the right thing to do for our family, it's only been almost 4 months and I'm already getting exhausted.

Learning that I have to be both. Mom and dad, both fun parent and mean parent. I think it confuses my kids that they won't know how to trust me or, be close to me due to confusion in there younger age.

I just want to speak to people who know what I'm going through. People say it's not like he's going away for good but, honestly when your in that moment, and you'll know the moment. When your waiting days, weeks for him to return it is like it's forever.

When no one around you knows what it's like for you. And for your family to go through such a huge change. It's hard.

We talk everyday on the phone yes it's something, but if you are a truckers wife then you know sometimes it's not enough.

I feel like without him here I have no support system, people to talk to. I feel alone in this cus let's face it family doesn't really understand, because they have never had to go through it themselves.

I'm here for advice, friends, connections.