Married to a selfish trucker

by Marie
(Chicago, IL, United States)

My husband and I are both 24 and have been married for two years, he is also an otr trucker gone Monday trough Friday and home on the weekends.

I'm usually really excited to see him on the weekends and will try to plan a nice Friday evening or a chill weekend and he will want to spend as much time as possible with his friends.

He will invite them into our plans, or make new plans and won't tell me. Sometimes he's even sabotaged our plans and go be with his boys. He doesn't know how to have an argument and during one he'll get upset and go hang out with his friends and won't talk to me until after midnight, but he'll come home and want to have sex with me.

When I bring it up he gets upset and says that he shouldn't have to choose between me or his friends, he should be able to hang out with both of us the same. He tells me to make him a schedule for when I want to hang out with him.

He does whatever he wants whenever he wants with no regard to me and than he'll leave on Monday and be gone all week and I'm stick with my anger and loneliness.

I just don't know what to do anymore, I love him and want to support him but I feel like he doesn't support me, he doesn't understand how lonely I am and doesn't seem to care.

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Jun 14, 2015
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Truckers wife NEW
by: Angel

My husband is the same way we've been together almost 8 years and he wad selfish and rude and didn't care about no one but himself and his friends I was controlled told what to do and how to do it and when you have enough you will wake up one day and not care any more u will fall out of love and move on as I have and the sad thing is we can tell them what their doing wrong a thousand times a day but if they don't see what their doing wrong they won't change but good luck honey but my advice is you only have one life to live are you sure this is the way you'd live it and I am 23 and have a baby starting over is hard but I'd rather die alone as to be back in that relationship

Feb 12, 2015
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idea NEW
by: Anonymous

If I were u I would make plans with my friends tell him he can go and if he goes fine if not go ant way reverse

Treat him the way he treating u he might understand better

Nov 11, 2014
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Been there done that. NEW
by: Jessi

My ex husband was not a truck driver, but he was a very mean selfish man. I was with him over 10 years. In that time I constantly catered to his every whim, hoping if I just did one more thing right that he may love me more. He may change.
After 10 years and a bad divorce, he still has not changed. You can not make someone change or grow up.
I had a dear friend of mine ask me once "if you knew nothing was going to change, would you still want him in your life in 2 years?"
"What if you only have 2 years let to live, would you want this to be your life?" The day she asked me that was the day that I knew I had to make a change. It wasnt long till he hurt me again and I left.

I spent a little time single and loved it, I found me. Now I have met a wonderful man who is a trucker, and the love we share is beautiful!

My lesson was, you can't change someone and you can't force love that isn't there. It;s ok to move on and be happier by yourself than miserable with someone.

Oct 19, 2014
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And....... NEW
by: Anonymous

He is very selfish & if I were in your shoes I would have left!!! Doesn't that tell you something, that he would rather be with his friends & he finds happiness with them & he is only using you for sex! Get on your walking shoes girl & walk away & don't look back! You deserve better, you are only 24, there are plenty of fish in the ocean! Find yourself a good divorce lawyer! Good luck!

Oct 19, 2014
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