Much harder than I ever expected

by Addie
(Colorado Springs, CO)

Our Vowel Renewal Oct 2014

Our Vowel Renewal Oct 2014

My hubby just became a trucker. He literally just got his training dispatch this morning and is headed from TX to CA. The last 4 weeks he's been going through training and orientation, and I was at least able to see him 1 night a week until we put him on a plane on V-Day eve to Dallas. I won't see him again for about 5 weeks.

Unfortunately, and admittedly, I am not nearly as strong and independent as some and I find myself having daily meltdowns - sometimes 2-3 times a day. For 15 years, we've been virtually inseparable. He is my best friend and needless to say, the love of my life.

I am so proud of him for getting through this and know that by him doing so, he is setting us up for a secure future - but my heart aches. Our 3 girls are older, 2 left at home, 16 and 14, so they are more independent and don't "need" mom as much, so I don't have little ones to keep me busy and preoccupied.

This last summer, we moved to a new town and it's been tough to make new friends. I am finding myself quite lonely and isolated, and hope to find other trucker wives that can offer some moral support to get me through this without losing my sanity!

Comments for Much harder than I ever expected

Average Rating starstarstarstarstar

Click here to add your own comments

Feb 20, 2015
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
To Addie NEW
by: Anonymous

Hi, is Colorado Springs, CO, where you are living at right now while your husband is away doing trucking? If that is where you are at, there is plenty outdoor stuff to do! I know because my husband was stationed at Fort Carson & every year we vacation there & you are in God's country! You have Garden of the Gods, the Manitou incline, Seven Falls, I can go on & on but I know if I was living in the Springs I sure would be doing a lot of outdoor activity to keep me busy & relax me! Can't forget the 2 big malls there - Citadel Mall & the Chapel Hills Mall! Good luck!

Feb 20, 2015
Rating
starstarstarstarstar
Becoming strong and independent
by: Hervy

Don't worry, you can be AS strong and AS independent as you need to be to handle this and do so with a smile. It is a process but it is doable. You have already started by looking at how the situation benefits you down the road.

Just be proactive in nurturing the relationship. Alter how you deal with each other. Instead of allowing everything he deals with to create unknowns and voids in his life, learn more about trucking and what he will face. You are here so there is another step in the right direction.

Being in the know to some extent about the trucking lifestyle allows you to still communicate and interact with each other AND having something to talk about in EACH persons life at a more intimate level. He will love that you get some of the thing that he might mention.

(Some women don't take that initiative and then wonder why he doesn't say much about his day. It's because she shows no interest in his day or job and only allows it to agitate her and be bitter in many cases. Why would he talk about his day, unless he is complaining to show that it is not all peaches and cream for him either.)

This summer make sure to let the kids visit grandparents or 1st cousins for a few weeks and join him on the road.

Also, have a plan or develop a plan for the future. He doesn't have to keep driving over the road. You can be looking into local trucking companies after learning more about what things to look for in a trucking company. The gives him less work to do finding a new opportunity after he gets his 1 year of experience.

Lots of women get frustrated because they only think of the change and fail to realize things don't have to be the way it is when a driver starts. There are many many choices for most drivers once he/she gets 1 year of experience.

As far as finding friends, don't wait for them to initiate. You can make friends by being friendly to people you meet and asking questions about how they spend their time. Also take a class, join a group book club, go to the gym, do yoga or pursue other positive interests where people will be that you have something in common with. Toastmasters is another one.

Click here to add your own comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Life As A Trucker's Wife.







Get Coaching